We thought it would be fun to eat Mr. Bear
Journey wanted in on the fun.
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I know you all must think I am becoming a bit bipolar or something as one day my post is down and depressing (sorry) and then the next I am cheery and excited. Ah, so is the life of a military wife apparently. For now at least. But, I tell you. I have this new sense of love in my life. I feel like I have fallen in love all over again. Something I really didn't know could ever be possible. Even though the love of my life is away, I have felt more love for him than I've ever known. That saying, "absence makes the heart grow fonder?", it is true, but there is so much more. I have been writing him every day since he left. I write to him as if we were having a conversation, its one way I get through the day. I tell him about my day, the new things Cheyanne has done, what kind of mood she is in, what I've been thinking about, what I dream about. All the things that quite frankly I probably would never even tell him. Things that either slip my mind in the day or things I don't know he would appreciate, before that is. Now, I make mental notes throughout my day, "Things to tell Hubs." "Today I did laundry and it took me three hours to fold clothes because I couldn't focus." "Today Cheyanne grabbed her first toy on her own. It was a xxx that looks like xxx." "Today I am feeling down because xxxx." "Today has been a great day because xxxx." Things that maybe I wouldn't have shared before. I feel like am reconnecting, to my husband and to myself. Even though I don't get feedback during my letter conversations and I don't have him to communicate with, I know that he loves reading my thoughts. I know that this has become our way of reconnecting. I am truly enjoying it. Its the close to each of my days. After I've put the baby to bed, and I have a little quiet to myself, I recall my mental list and write to my love. And usually write and write and write, and then edit it down to one page since he doesn't have time to read more than one page at a time. Its like I'm living my life twice, for someone who doesn't get to.
I received a letter from him today. He again said how much he appreciates all the letters he has been receiving. It really is such an encouragement to him to know he is not just forgotten. He has received letters from people he doesn't even know. Thank you! Thank you everyone for loving us enough to support us when we need it most. Let's keep those letters coming. If you'll write the note, I'll even pay for the stamp. Or as many as you'll send. Cross my heart, hope to die, stick a needle in my eye. Worst promise saying ever, fyi, I don't really want any of those 3 things to happen, but I absolutely will pay for the postage ;) But he also said to tell everyone he is doing well, misses us horribly which is his hardest issue, but is at the top of his flight and holds the highest position a trainee can hold over a squadron. He is "dorm chief" in charge of his entire squadron meaning lots of extra responsibility and causes a lot more harassment for him because when anyone in his squadron does something wrong, he gets what they get and more. But he is passing everything with flying colors. I knew my boy would rock it. Physically of course he is nailing it, but it continues to be a daily struggle to not be sad he is missing us. His baby girl in particular. This is where he needs the most encouragement.
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Now on to a fun little something having to do with a certain 13lb 3oz and 22 1/2 inches long 3 month old baby girl. (Threw in the stats because I knew you would want to know)
So yes, it is 3 months ago today that our precious little girl entered the world. How is that possible? The day my life was forever changed. But oh my word is she acting all of her three months. She was in such a fantastic mood today, until tonight of course. But all day she was smiling and talking and missing her daddy. I could just tell. Call it mother’s intuition if you will. And I got her something extra special for her 3 months on earth. Snow. And lots of it. It snowed about 5 inches today. Entirely too cold to take her out in it, but so fun to watch fall.
Standing on my parents' front porch facing our farm
Have I told you about her favorite toy? Well its not exactly a toy, but it is her absolute FAV! She gets really excited every time she sees it. I am so serious. She loves this…..
And do I mean excited?! Like jumps up and squeals and talks to it. A lighthouse magnet. Weird?! OH YEAH! I realized it when I after a few times of me standing next to the kitchen island holding her with my back to the fridge, she did this same routine of excitement. Finally, after moving around things on the fridge and watching what she was honed in on, I figured it out. And I swear on my life, it wasn’t once or twice. It is every single time I walk by the fridge with her. Hysterical! Its like everyone has always said, you can buy your child all the toys in the world, and they will end up playing with the boxes more. So is my child.
love love love
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